don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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