omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize