Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
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