If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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