did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Randomize
