Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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