What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
My ass is underappreciated
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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