"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
