Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
