Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
