if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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