For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
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