So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
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And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize