so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers