What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
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we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
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It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.