And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
How external is "for external use only"?
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
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