that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
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