Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
These 27 Hilarious People Wrote Their Own Obituaries
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
23 Men Confess What Gifts Would Brighten Their Day
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?