..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
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Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
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Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.