I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
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