you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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