Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
