conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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