they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Im just a social blackout drinker.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
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