she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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