Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.