suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?