That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
