just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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