She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
This is the high leading the old right now
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
