Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Randomize
