keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize