i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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