have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize