I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
