ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize
