none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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