grandma shit on top of the toilet
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
i think im in europe. pls send help
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
