He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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