Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like. http://tfl.nu/tgx7
  Replies (33) Good night (1300) Bad night (2831)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure http://tfl.nu/itoo
  Replies (6) Good night (3996) Bad night (1135)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (954): I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee. http://tfl.nu/z4i3
  Replies (7) Good night (2473) Bad night (835)
• Favorite

  (646): View more from New York

  Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (646): Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going? http://tfl.nu/kahl
  Replies (12) Good night (2646) Bad night (4587)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp http://tfl.nu/f0ut
  Replies (32) Good night (2058) Bad night (4589)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (502): She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage.... http://tfl.nu/ha8c
  Replies (6) Good night (2921) Bad night (1279)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin http://tfl.nu/22om
  Replies (10) Good night (2018) Bad night (901)
• Favorite

  (252): View more from North Carolina

  It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (252): It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there. http://tfl.nu/94gv
  Replies (17) Good night (1257) Bad night (3522)
• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (607): I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson. http://tfl.nu/gvkr
  Replies (13) Good night (3468) Bad night (988)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (760): all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing. http://tfl.nu/78qs
  Replies (6) Good night (1992) Bad night (708)
• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  How did I end up in the pool?!

  (480): View more from Arizona

  Welcome to ASU

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (323): How did I end up in the pool?! (480): Welcome to ASU http://tfl.nu/zi7q
  Replies (8) Good night (2557) Bad night (793)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (734): I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony. http://tfl.nu/i9iy
  Replies (3) Good night (1498) Bad night (777)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (405): All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before. http://tfl.nu/9m83
  Replies (9) Good night (652) Bad night (1451)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted... http://tfl.nu/r2o3
  Replies (1) Good night (1576) Bad night (718)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (360): you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like. http://tfl.nu/0urz
  Replies (1) Good night (629) Bad night (379)

Randomize