He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Randomize