what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I stole a fireplace last night.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize