How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
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