i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
No more Irish car bombs ever.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Randomize
