I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize