she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
