Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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