awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
