you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
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Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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