Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
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By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
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I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
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