i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Randomize
