I think i sorta joined a cult last night
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Randomize