Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
