The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize