even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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